sisters before misters

Being the bigger person is hard...

Heart fuck glass ceiling's current girlfriend/now possible ex texted me tonight.  The girl he started seeing when he got so shady before, and the same that he dumped me to get back with a couple weeks ago.  She had questions she needed answered, in order to move on either with or without him, and I sadly am the only one that could do that for her.

I really, reeeeeeeeeeeally wanted to ignore her.  I can't send texts out right now due to the fact that I am horrible at being an adult so it would have been really easy.  On the other hand, I could take this opportunity to tell someone who actually cares what a horrible fucking person I think he is and that could be fun.

I didn't do either.  I hit her up via Facebook and gave her the truth she was looking for.  It mostly matched what he'd told her.  There was a little bending of the truth but he's a fucking douche so I'm shocked that it wasn't more widespread.  Sorry, my maturity about this whole thing does not extend to him.

I talked to her from 4 till 5.  While it initially hurt to hear how much he tells her he loves her and how sorry he is and how badly he wants to fix everything, it was great closure on this stupid fucking chapter of my life.  It sucks ass that I wasted my summer falling for someone who fell for someone else, but I'm not sorry for the lessons in human nature I received along the way... and how much strength I've gained from this whole failed experiment in love.

I gave her small pieces of advice.  "Listen to your gut", "talk to him about this and see how he reacts", and my piece de resistance, "people do dumb shit".  I told her exactly what I needed to hear when I was in her shoes before, had I had the self-preservation to text my loves' exes/currents/mistresses to get the answers I always wanted, so many years ago.  And, on some weird ass level, it felt like finally closing the door on my past mistakes and failings.

She thanked me a lot for getting back to her.  And she was very apologetic for what he put me through.  I super appreciate that, though she has absolutely nothing to be sorry for.

Sisters, we so often blame the other women in these situations.  We cast anger and hurt and so much negative energy at those that aren't necessarily at fault.  And all that does is create more barriers in a world where what we really need is more connections, more honesty and so much more understanding.

We're in this together, ladies AND gents.  Let's fucking act like it.  It actually feels quite nice.