single mom bitchings

Everyone knows that parenting on your own sucks.  Single moms everywhere attempt to instill their girls with this knowledge in hopes that they won't follow suit, but I've learned something during this time on my own and it's that half the stuff my mom bitched about is bullshit.  It's true, this shit sucks, but not for most of the reasons my mother gave me.  So here is my list of reasons that doing this by myself is the fucking pits.

Getting laid is difficult
Ok, so I'm pretty alright with not being able to do whomever I want whenever I want (because we all know the awful decisions I'm capable of making in the name of getting some), but not being able to get any like ever is driving me up the fucking wall.  I don't really want a full-time man and I refuse to let anyone meet my mini so I'm kind of fucked... or not, as the case truly is.



Can't afford cigarettes
I have a true love/hate relationship with smoking.  It's my escape when mass amounts of wine are not a good idea and my personal timeout when Luke is doing something that pushes me to the literal edge of insanity.  While completely quitting is something that I actually do want to accomplish, being forced into it by finances makes doing so utterly unbearable... and so I don't, because I'm a rebel like that.  But when I can't afford wine because I bought too many packs of Parliaments... that's a moment that just bites.

Car is disgusting
Cracker crumbs in all of the seat belt buckles, stickyness all over the CD player, hand and foot prints on the windows, a smell that I can't quite place nor locate... blegh.

Day drinking is no longer an option
ASdkfjl;asdkjpfoihs;aodifhasioehrpioehawio;sdfjso;idfjql!!!!!!

Basing all of your decisions on the welfare of your child
Being a formerly self-absorbed asshole, this one is really difficult.  Gone are the days where I can disappear into a bottle for a week at a time.  Gone is the ability to blow my paycheck in one night out.  Gone are the times where I can just disappear and reappear whenever the fuck I feel like it.  Ugh.

No.  Fucking.  Time.
So this is one that my mom did really let me in on, but I did not completely grasp the concept until recently.  Between work, dropping mini off and then picking him back up from daycare, preparing meals, attempting to keep the house clean, homework (seriously?  He's two!), baths, laundry, trying to see my friends on a more than a yearly basis, trips to the park, playdates and sometimes trying to get to bed on time, I have no personal time whatsoever.  Right this second, I am putting off laundry, cleaning, bill paying and getting to bed... all just so I can get drunk and whine on the interwebs.

Guilt
For everything... seriously.

Meeting someone and knowing that eventually you're going to have to determine their worth as a stepdad
While there are probably 50 more things I could bitch about, this will be the last and is definitely the most annoying of all.  I've never really been attracted to the responsible and emotionally healthy type, so this is the one that I'm having the most trouble with.

Hot, tattooed guy buying me shots at the bar during the rare night out?  Yeah, something tells me that the couple prison tats I can single out may be an indicator that he's not going to be a good role model for my boy.  Oh, you're traveling the world making a documentary about the mating habits of drunk chicks on spring break?  Yeah, probably not a good idea to let you within 5 feet of my kiddo.














After all this bitching, I want to acknowledge that there really are a lot of reasons why this single parent gig rocks socks, but that's a whole entry for another day.  Right now, I'm going to drink more wine, smoke more cigarettes and attempt to read something that's not on the internet.  So irresponsible.